Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Abg Hj

Pertemuan yg tak disangaka i and Tuan Hj@Abg Hj bermula 6 years ago, our lovehate relationship. Forbidden love katanya.That time i was in university,juggling with books,assigment,exam and etc (include:searching for centa suci).As for the question why i so stupid and gatai bercenta dng Abg Hj although i knew that he's a bapak budak and laki org? I don't have any specific answer anyway,dari segi sciencetific mahupun dari sudut moral seorang manusia yg bergelar perempuan.
Tidak pula i put a blame on love is blind itu,yg buta cinta bukan si pencenta ye.I admit my mistake. Katakan la apa2 saja specially kata2 yg tak baik didengar for pencenta bapak budak and laki org mcm i.It's was over and done.

Abg Hj storytell:
He's just an ordinary men,nothing special about him.Nak kata handsome jauh sekali kan Bang.He's gemok and fendek (lelaki idaman i selalunya tinggi lampai,eh persetan la dng i punya physical characteristic sana).Pandang sebelah mata pon tahu yg he's married men.If pandang dua belah mata sah2 org ingat he's atok to be,da bermenantu.In our 1st year of relationship Abg Hj punya style mmg typical bapak2 budak.Everytime we met, sure pakai baju zaman2 80s muda belia dolu2.He said"Semua baju2 yg abg pakai ni my late brother beli masa study kat US dulu, that why abg simpan and jaga baik2 until now".Whatever la bang.Tak padan langsung dng i yg very the vouge that time.Mcm jln dng bapak2 ok(he's 20 years older than me).I pon tidaklah se gorgeous Eva Mendes kegilaan Ash (he's turn-on dng bontot u je.Tak gitu Apam?So disgusting ok). I tak nak la perasan as if i lah wanita gorgeous idaman jejantan sedunia,kan Pam kan.Cukup la i explain disini yg i have a good taste in fashion and beauty.Abg Hj told me so,silala muntah Pam.Tak susah pon for me nk mencari boyfriend or kekasih gelap and yg seumpamanya that time cuma i ni yg kunon2nya very selective.Bercakap about harta benda,adakah Abg Hj seorang yg breta benda?Cukup2 makan ankbini+gf je.So what make he's so special to u ,Biah?The way he love me lah.He love me like a kid. Like a kid who doesn’t want to share his lollipop (why lollipop?tak hade benda lain ke) with anyone else.He adore me and makes me feel wanted.Not like the other,specially the men about my age yg completely boring and stupid (bukan semua la ye) He's more mature, experienced and intelligent (tang mature tu i salah anggapan roughpa2nya)

Bukan i tak tahu apa bahananya percentaan terlarang itu,i do.Many times juga i try to walk out from our relationship,i ignore his call and sms even email and ym massager.Berhari2 dan berminggu2 i tak answer his call then bila puas sendiri i cari him back.Begitulah seterusnya.Kalau hendak seribu daya kan.Abg Hj ni kuat jealous org nya,al maklumlah dapat gf muda remaja and hot,almost everyday he came to my place.Bawak i p lunch,hi-tea sampai lah dinner,print out assignments, grocery.Hence p library yg kat atas bukit nun pon Abg Hj ada next to me.Indahkan percentaan i.Abg Hj selalu berkata" Sometimes abg kesian dng u cause bila kita kelua sure org pandang2 jeling2 kat u semacam".Ada i kisah?I don't care bang,bjalan kehulu kehilir dng u.I don't care what other people think about me,that show how much i love u (centa la kunon) Sampailah Abg Hj bertukar fesyen ala2 rome tak jadi, bini him suspicious juga katanya.Ye la tetiba je laki u beli baju baru,pandai pakai jeans,tersengeh sorang2 depan pc at home,hp tak lekang dr tangan,asal weekend je g keje katanya,balik pg2 subuh and mcm2 strange activity lagi lah.Kata2 dusta Abg Hj, bini nya pemalas,tak masak,rumah tak berkemas(eh wanita berkerjayakan,selalu masuk paper) tak layan him zahir batin,kuku kaki tangan pon tak ber trimmed,tak peduli about his needs and segala alasan logic yg digunakan jantan kat gf bangangnya.

I pasrah je bila ada yg mengatakan i ni pompuan tak sedar diri,mcm da tah hade jantan lain,fikir la sikit apa perasaan his wife and the kids.And i agree bila pompuan2 yg seangkatan dng i said"Bukan semua pompuan yg bercenta dng laki org ni jahat,mata duitan and perampas ok" During my early 20's dulu ramai yg i tengok ada affair dng married men, masing2 punya their own reasons.Some of them cause of suka2,kerana wang ringgit dan rete benda,cause of revenge katanya(apa2 je la kan),cause of miang(mmg dasar pompuan slut),kerna terpaksa...and mcm2 lagi lah.Dan tidaklah i menyokong trend tak sihat ini.Why oh why?Adakah i ni terikut2 dng this trend?No.Banyak lagi trend yg boleh jadi ikutan i.Pandai sungguhkan Abg Hj bermain kata2,bertahun lamanya bercenta secara forbidden dng i but his wife tak penah tahu pon.Pandai sangat ke org tua tu?Tidak ok.Why bini him tak penah tahu?Cause of me la,i boleh buat mcm2 cara to hurt bini menopause u bang.Ring her ke,sms or email her, tak pon p jumpa her face to face.Women to women (amboi,mcm duk berebut soltan Brunei). Just let her know about us.Let her know what cloth u really cut from.Bia your wife tahu that now is her turn kena tipu dng u.Why i tak buat begitu?Cause i love him la,i tak sanggup betray him dng cara sekeji itu.Tak sampai hati nk hurt bini menopause him and make his kids suffer.Tak tergamak i,bang.Cause i pon ada akakabang and anak2 sedara (about his kids age).I know how it's feel.

U said u don't love her anymore kan bang.Kata2 dusta u "I stayed because of the kids je,i tak sanggup loss them" U tahu tak bang mcm mana hancurnya hati i dng kata2 dusta u?I look at his daughter fb acc,duk upload pic family (biasa la budak2 sekolah kan).Four of them.Bukan main senyum gumbira kan u bang,eh da namanya family portrait kan kena la senyum.Siap caption"we we happy family ,check it out for nstp tomorrow ye,we all masuk paper".Yang tak boleh bla about this Tuan Hj is,everytime his binik masuk paper sedaya upaya nk tunjuk kat i.Yes bang,i admit binik u mmg among the success women yg i penah tahu,keja pon kat international company.Selalu fly sana sini just like u juga.So what are u trying to do?Itu saja ke yg u boleh banggakan about your wife bang?Bini u pakai bra mak2 brand apa?Beli baju kat kedai mana?Bathroom mcm tak cuci in age?Pakai make-up morahan or not?Rumah bersepah tahap end of the word?Kedut2 tang mana?Semua i tahu tau bang.If bini u hebat sangat why u masih cari betina kat lua sana?And yes,am not the only betina yg Tuan Hj ada ye (u kata i slut kan bang, so how about youself bang?jantan jenis apa u ni?),according to him,before i pon he always saja ada affair kat lua cuma dng i je lama cause am a single lady and tak demanding (this part i saja2 tambah) yg lain semua bini org or mak and akak janda yg baru kenal last week then next month da ajak kawin.

Why finally i left him?Because i jumpa jantan lain mcm yg u selalu katakan tu ke bang?I left u because i love u,bang.Even perangai u buruk nauzubillah.Sepanjang bersama u,bang.I terima u apa adanya, baik buruk u,gemok fendek u, your jealousy yg buat i hampir2 tak bermasyarakat langsung and even u berpenyakit kedekut Hj Bahkil syndrome.I relakan bang,cause i da terlanjur centa mati dng u.I tak pernah regret.Now hidup i suffer like this.Why bang?Because of u juga.I terima balasan dr kejahilan i bersama u dulu.Centa palsu u membunuh cinta suci i.U yg tak pernah sure dng our relationship.Kejap kata nak commit kejap tak sure.Boleh je bang if i nk buat bini menopause u naik hantu and minta divorce dng u.Cause u selalu bagi mcm2 reasons kan why u tak sanggup ceraikan bini tua u,cause of the kids la kunon.Bini tua u tu pon dulu menikah dng u cause she's finally success juga dlm mission merampas laki org and make u divorce your 1st wife and left your innocence boys kan.Tak gitu Bang Hj,so tak usah la u nak back-up bini menopause u, bang.She's just like me,pompuan slut yg tak sedar diri but at least i tak rampas laki org mcm her.Your 1st wife dulu pon apa kurangnya kan bang,sucess juga org nya.Cuma da gemok mcm u la not like your current wife yg kurus kerempeng and kedut2 itu.Your boys pulak,u tunggu lagi 2 or 3 years from now sure u dapat menantu kan bang.Tergamak pulak ye u left them?Sejahat2 i bang,i tak pernah minta u tinggal your kids.I can even sayang your kids mcm ank i sendiri (alah hai lah statement angan2 mak tiri)

Abg Hj,please don't say i left u because of i ni mata duitan org nya.U pon bukan berharta benda sangat,Sebutir 916 gold ring pon u tak penah bagi i tau,yg ada cuma fake diamond ring yg still i simpan until now.Why?Because i value our relationship.Baru sekarang u cakap"Now abg da mampu nk bawak u p jalan oversea yang (bini u pon sayang juga kan bang),balik la sini then kita p Korea"Now da banyak duit ke bang?Bila i ask u belikan i rumah u diam pulak kan bang.Alah dulu pon u tak penah bawak i holiday mana2 even dlm Tanah Malaya ni and i don't mind bang but bila turn bini menopause u pandai plak u tipu i kunon blk kg ye,roughpa2nya u pegi fantasia bulan madu sejuk2 nun.Mana i tak angin bang,but i still maafkan u.Salah ke i bila i mahukan hak i?Salah ke bila i question u about bilanya u nak menikah dng i?Kata cinta.U said"If abg nk kawin dng u,my wife bukan boleh buat apa,nak tak nak she kena accept"Pandai cakap je u ni bang.Yang paling menyakitkan hati i,bila u cakap"What if my wife ask me to choose between u and her?How about my kids?I syg my kids."Sapa yg tak syg ank bang? (how about me bang? Ada u fikir?) Macam haram jaddah kan u,bang.Then i left u,habis cite bang.Why i nak waste my time tunggu u,bang?Tunggu janji2 palsu u sambil i makan hati berulam jantung and menambah dosa collection yg sedia ada.Bila bercakap about dosa pahala mula la u mengata i ni pretend alim ustazah lah.Bang Hj,we both sama dilahirkan as a muslim and we do understand about Islamic law.About what's wrong and what's right.U sendiri yg 20 years older than me tak kan tak tahu dosa pahala bang?Buat apa tittle Hj u tu?pak mertua u pon tok imam masjid kg dotdot kan?U tak percaya adanya mati?Adanya syurga neraka?It's up to u bang.i can't do anything and here (if u read this blog bang) i tak kuasa nk berceramah agama dng u.Dosa masing2 tanggung kan.

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