Monday, July 16, 2012

Pandai

Intro
Sakit I ni tak tahu la makin chronic atau sebaliknya,drama sungguh.I had demam first in the morning (almost everyday),akibatnya I susah nak bangun from the bed,kena take times then kerja kerja I jadi sangat slow.I cepat penat.Segalanya serba tak kena.Later in the evening the demam datang lagi.When I told tis to my gp,kata him it's normal la puan then he tells me to continue with the medicines.Kena p check up slalu ,tak larat I dibuatnya and the tak boleh bla part is my gp asik la suruh I stay in the hospital which the bills boleh simpan buat beli handbag made in Italy.Tapi kan tidak la I kisahkan about the bill cause bukan duit I pon.Bila da sakit macam ni segalanya macam tak ada erti dan mula la ingat about mati dan dosa yang menggunung itu.I tak excited pon duk tunggu present from Erope sana.My kesayangan sister asik la duk whatsapps tanya nak apa lagi from there,bila I tells her yang I tak nak apa apa lagi then she's small heart pulak.Karang if I minta macam macam tak larat pulak nak bayaq the credit card.


Jantan pandai
Bila tinggal serumah dengan pakar IT pakar ekonomi ni memang banyak benda yang tak penah I bayangkan akan terjadi.My account has been hacked few months ago.Marah la jugak but after a while tak koser la I nak fikir.If I ask tis to him sure lain pulak jadinya nanti.So I changed the password beside that tak ada benda personal pon yang I nak hide from him.Memang la ada chats history between me and the Hj but ada I kisah?.We both tak ada la duk discuss about our centa suci yang tak kesampaian itu or meluahkan perasaan rindu dendam yang da bersarang or duk discuss benda benda yang boleh caused the nafsu serakah naik sampai kepala.Tipah tells me,try la forward semua evidence yang you ada to Kak Hapam's laki then we see la apa kata that laki.Entah la,I rasa macam jahat sangat nak buat macam tu or maybe I'am afraid of myself,if I told the whole truth banyak lagi benda yang akan terbongkar and it will hurting me badly.So meroyan la I in tis blog but I believe the truth was always in the somewhere...

Laki I juga selalu ridiculed me about the simple simple things like how to spell tis and that in English or he will tanya I about the general knowledge or current issues,etc yang kononya he's the one yang serba tahu as if I ni tak p sekolah then bila I boleh jawab he will asked me back,mana you tahu?.I said,I tahu la.Dengan tabiaat jarang jarang membaca I ni and tell me la buat apa ada bff macam Bang Hj tu kan even tis Hj tak ada Phd.Excuse me,I bukan macam Kak Hapam yang spelling and grammar nya sangat la oh my english!.Then when she's write in Malay pulak dah serupa minah rempit.Sometimes it take an ages la nak paham apa yang tis Apam typed.Tahu pulak laki I marah cause I mengata Apam tak sekolah tinggi.Well,I didn't say yang I ni pandai sangat than Apam but the fact is I memang lebih pandai than her.


kawan pandai
Recently,ada sorang kawan yang jadi part-time ustazah,the best binik,mother and daughter in the pasebook duk prong prang(ayat rempit) about penggunaan&ejaan bahasa Melayu yang betul.Pah,sure you kenal tis diva.Maklum je la tis person work as editor in the very very well known agency,(yes I'am envied her) but then yang buat I geli geleman is tis person tak mempraktikkanya.She's still menggunaan bahasa dan ejaan rempit like'kiter:kita,die:dia or mati?,kengkawan:kawan kawan,iyer:iya etc.Bila ditegur,she tried to menegakkan benang then keluaq la statement yang mengatakan she's didn't mean to tunjuk pandai even da terang terang la all her friends boleh nampak the mistake.Admit je la salah you,tak susah pon and I myself tak koser nak argue dengan you.Nak educate orang ni senang, just prong prang in the pasebook to tunjuk we're the pandai one but you have to well prepared nak nak lagi bila the busy body like me was in the friend's list.


Pandai cakap
Dilaser oleh ****,(the scene is like Nyonya Mansoor talked to Kassim Selamat on the phone)yang suka suka mengatakan that I'am not a good mother cause I didn't visit the grave and how could I forget about that?.I wish she walk in my shoes,live my sorrow and my pain...

Friday, July 13, 2012

Centa Lama

I'am not gila bayang not yet gila talak but I just mengingati kenangan kenangan yang boleh buat I tersenyum agar I tak melupakanya.

***

hi sayang abg,
Tq for spending time with me today, i'm so sorry for being late and abg hope you jangan buat muka kat abg ok sayang :o).You're so adorable with your spec. Actually abg tengok aje you dengan spek tu,and with the outfit you wear..hmmm you really know how to make me loose my mind over you ye sayang :o) and i love you for it.

Even we spend just a few hours but it was a quality time tht we spent together, next time kita gi tgk movie k sayang. Like abg told you, abg really looking forward to see you in your doctorate robe..and i will be the most happiest man alive to see you in tht costume. But apa pun..we take it a step at a time k baby, make sure you pass with flying colors.Finish your degree first then we think the master program pulak k..and abg hope you wont give up half way. But if you want to rest b4 you continue your master pun ok juga..but it depends on the situation la kan :o)

Sayang tau tak, why abg love you so much?

1. you accept me the way i am..and that really melt my heart coz even at my age..you can still see my true feelings inside me but not my age.

*yes,centa itu buta,sama buta dengan mata I*

2. You're so mature even you not notice it,mature in handling a man like me sbb kadang tu abg more like a kid to you but you still entertain my character..and i love you for that.

*mature la sangat*

3. **** willing to do anything just to be with me even when you have to cancel your class just because you want to be with me..abg really appreciate it very..very much sayang..and i love you for that.

*oh tis part I regret sangat sangat.Awat nya p gatai skip class segala biah oi if not every semester I dapat dl,kan Pah?*

4. **** manja :o)..and you know when to show it and you know how to do it without making abg rimas ..and i love it so very much.

*please don't muntah ye,Pah*

5. **** very open about your relantionship with the others and that make me more comfortable but even abg jealous but at least i know you dont keep secret behind me..and i love you for that.

*cause I'am not kaki kelentong like you bang,centa cakap tak centa*

6. **** always ensure abg that you wont leave me no matter what..and you do it just to make me feel secure and abg really appreciate it..and that make me love you more.

*sorry la cause finally I left you jugak but please don't forget tis,I tinggal you demi kebahagiaan you and the binik*

7. **** not only pretty but you also very smart, and to me that is sexy. But abg consider myself lucky cause i got a good package..the brain and definately your beautiful face.

*blush kejap,puih...I ni tak hade la cantik macam janda Tom Cruise or tak juga sexy macam Pamela Anderson Malaya but then of course la I lagi gorgeous than Kak Hapam kembang ithu*

8. Abg rasa you're meant to me, and definately you're made in heaven for me and just me..thank you baby for being in me even at the later age of me. But i believe it happen for a reason and both of us happy. And that makes things more meaniful kan sayang..i love you so very much.

*tu la you rasa je but you never make an efforts pon tak habis habis la duk risaukan binik you but am glad it was over*

Thank you baby for being there for me..

XOXO..143
Abg

***

I had a long chat with the Hj last morning (jantan biasa la,after I mengungkit ungkit his janji palesu baru la terhegeh hegeh nak tipon tanya khabar,kawan baik la konon).He tells me,yesterday abg p to my friend's funeral,sedih cause my friend tu muda lagi dan anak anak depa kecik kecik pulak tu.Mulut I yang laser ni nak je cakap,"then bawak bawak bertaubat la bang cause mati tu tak kenal usia" but siapalah I ni kan.Tis Hj's bapak mertua is the imam so let the bapak mertua yang membimbing him kejalan yang benar.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Tiada Lagi

Hari ini setelah bulan,minggu dan hari silih berganti I masih meratapi pemergian orang orang tersayang dalam hidup I.Nothing will ease that.Pemergian yang harus I terima dengan redha.There's time I remember every single things about them and yes it's hurt dan bila sendirian begini I can feel that they're so close to me...rindu sangat.

My gp told me to banyak banyak berehat,jaga makan minum,take the medicine on time dan tenangkan fikiran.I hate hospital then they allowed me to stay at home.So berehat sungguh la I but as usual I have to juggling with the house chores,nak harap sapa lagi kan.Sakitnya terasa seluruh urut saraf,specially at night.I kerap terjaga then start la drama ayaq mata.I didn't tell my parent about tis cause I know my mak will get upset and worried so I tells my sisters to jaga mulut them.Ye la my Kak Ngah tu selalu je terlepas cakap depan my makapak, belum kira lagi her daughter yang mulut serupa maknenek.If not tak ada pasalnya adik beradik tahu I kena halau tengah malam buta.

Dengan keadaan I yang tak sihat ni,I have to stay even I don't know if I can.Terlalu banyak cerita sedih dalam rumah ni.I baru perasan lagu centa yang kononnya hanya untuk I,our love song la kaedahnya.Tanda centa him.Semuanya bullshit!.I found that he was dedicated that song to Kak Hapam too.Yes,pompuan like me will get upset over small small thing like this and if I told this anyone but a lunatic would consider me a lunatic too.Benda yang sudah usah dikenang kenang.Tak ada sudahnya when it comes about tis both cilaka.He knew how to hurt myself and he's already broke my heart badly and now I have no word for the way I feel and it's will be so much harder to get through the days...

Bang Hj made a promise(dulu dulu punya cerita),abang akan teman you kalau you masuk hospital cause I knew you tak suka stay there.I cuma mampooooo tersenyum(sweet nya) then I told him that there will be a time I will remind him of what he promised.Tengok je janji janji jantan ni boleh pakai ke tidak.Haram tis Hj nak menalipon I tanya khabar...

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

update

Anak anak
I tak koser nak marah atau berkecil hati bila ada saja yang bertanya,bila you ni nak beranak,biah?.My standard answer is,I tak ready lagi lah.Well,I'am not sure bilanya nak start a family.Some of my friends tu happy je beranak every year.Anak tak pandai jalan lagi da pregnant for the second baby.Some of them pulak mengusung anak kecik kecik kesana sini,dengan macam macam ragam.Kejap kejap the no 3 menangis then the no 2 bergaduh dengan the no 1.ish...I pulak yang pening.Since I lost my little darling baby,adik beradik& kaum kerabat tak ada pon busy body asking me the question like that because they're very undetstanding.I know for some people like them,bila tengok orang tak ada anak macam I ni they think my life sangat pathetic and incomplete.Depa je la baguih that why anak baru umur 2 bulan da ada pasebook account then start la the drama,oh tadi p shopping baju Guess for my baby at Subang Empire or anak mama cantik macam princess.Oh please la!!!Recently I dapat 2 orang anak sedara baru then anak anak sedara yang ada pasebook account suka nau la duk tagged my picture yang serupa pompuan tengah berpantang dukung baby.So makin ramailah orang duk bertanya.The best part is bila ada mulut serupa mega haram jadah bertanya,"ko ni mandul ke biah?Kawin bertahun tahu tak beranak beranak".Soalan serupa itu memang patut mendapat reward berupa carutan.Feel like to punch tis janda's face until her nose bled.I do wonder,why la some people suka nau menyakiti hati orang sesuka hati?.I try to be patient and I answered her politely.Why?.Because I pity her yang berpenyakit nyphomania (I heard tis from the very very reliable source ok)and hence mengenagkan how sengsaranya her life without the jantan yang sudi menikah with the janda like her.Let say la Kak Hapam yang bertanya serupa itu,sure akan I carutkan her back.Eh,I guess Kak Hapam mesti da beranak.So laki I officially lah jadi bapak tiri to Apam's anak.Congratulation darling!.Finally your dream came true jugak nak ada anak.Hiks...Kak Hapam,lepas ni if anak melalak tengah malam buta boleh la call laki I yer.


The kesian
This is story about someone yang kerjanya duk menyombong.Bila berjalan the nose went to the airs.Orang ada ada la katakan.Well tis person tak ada pertalian darah langsung dengan my family(thank God)but for the some reasons yang tak dapat nak dijelaskan me and myfamily have to hadap tis person cause we have no choice.Kata kata yang terkeluar from tis person's mouth memanglah sangat memualkan as if adik beradik&kaum kerabat I ni semuanya low class sangat.Excuse me,barang barang at my family's house lagi kelas than yours la.Buat malu orang Ampangan jo.Itu pon still nak menyombong lagi.I can't stand it bila a person like tis tak habis habis annoyed my family.At first my sisters and my late brother selalu la berkecil hati dengan statement from tis person but after that they don't give a shit anymore.Suka hati you lah nak berlagak to the hell sekali pon.Then nak dijadikan cerita tis person ditimpa musibah but it won't stop the mouth from mengeluarkan statement yang mega haram.I tells to my sisters,orang ni kalau memang by nature kerjanya menyombong duapuluhpat jam,it's hard to change the attitude(even da jatuh tersungkur) cause it's already on their blood.Atas rasa simpati my sisters pon tolong la apa yang patut then tis person terus la depending on my sisters,rajin pulak la bertandang to my parent's house,bertalipon segala.So I was reminding my sisters to buat baik berpada pada dan jangan rapat sangat to the person like tis.

Lubuk Antu
Until today,I masih lagi in tis small town.Menunggu pak boss bagi green light to us lakibinik then my dream untuk kembali ke Kuala Lumpur akan jadi kenyataan.Well,there are time he makes my life very hard,belum kira lagi ada orang ketiga duk sibuk masuk campur.Tak side mana mana la konon,puih....It's harder to get through the days actually and I miss my makapak everyday.Bang Hj pulak tak habis habis duk provoked I.Kata him,you tu takut sangat dengan laki.Then berjanji the moon and stars.Balik la sini if you tak happy,I'll make you happy.Kata him lagi.Confident je orang tua tu.

And now I'm suffering from ****.Penyakit yang memerlukan laki I spend a lot of money on it.