Wednesday, October 16, 2013

sayap sayap patah


Hi uols,Happy Eid Al-Adha...
Special occasions macam ni mula la I duk terkenangkan my late brother and I miss my little Zara a lot.If only he was still alive am sure he will do something for me and Adam and he would sayang Adam as much as he sayang me & Bella (adik manja sangat)

I sudah mendapatkan khidmad nasihat from the avang lawyer and setelah I memberi sepatah dua kata to that janten rumah tak bertangga I kembali tenang.There's no more ombak rindu la kaedahnya.Di tengah malam buta that janten mintak ampun from me.I didn't say a words pon cause the maafs already gone.Tak perlu la kau memohon maap segala cause I knew diri mu tetap la tak akan berubah.

Well I tahu that jantan decided to stay just because of Adam.I do told him yang diri ku tidak mengchintaing dirinya aymore.That jantan je yang tak terkata about the way he feel.Nevermind la khennn...I've said my peace.I do love Adam too but I don't think I could stay in tis broken marriage anymore.I want to be free and as in my previous post I know it will be so much harder to Adam and am feel bad about it but I da tak ada pilihan lagi.If I stay,the cycle continues.Both of us will gaduh over and over again and Adam will get hurt too.

The avang lawyer asked me,adakah I mempunyai jantan lain.Ish,pandai je kan.I ni memamg tak ada masa nak berscandal segala and let say if I ni ada kekasih gelap sekalipon sure la jantan tu makan hati dengan I cause nak berdating sorok sorok tu tak usah diharap la khenn...Nak berbalas message pon aku tak ada masa.I mempunyai tahap awareness yang sangat tinggi about tupai yang suka melopat then will fall in the ground jugak.That the reason why I tak berani nak jumpa the Hj berdua duan cause I takut terjatuh centa lagi dengan jantan tu.I juga tahu if I dicekup cureng sekalipon I can still dapat hak penjagaan Adam.

Ada orang penah cakap dengan I,when everytime I duk bergaduh+bertekak dengan that janten lalu hati jadi panas & dalam pale otak duk ingat nak bercerai berai, p la tengok at Adam's eyes then sure hati ku yang keras umpama batu ni akan lembut.I tried la jugak,yes hati I adalah sangat tersentuh bila tengok at Adam's eyes.Then when I listened to his giggle,oh my heart continuesly broke...After that tetap la aku rasa nak bercerai jugak.The avang lawyer said"sementara anak masih kecil ni baiklah puan bercerai sebab anak tu tak tahu apa apa lagi".The tak best part is I tak berapa comfortable when the avang tak habis habis duk tanya I this and that.





Yes...divorce is ugly!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Divorce.....to some it is ugly and to others it is a blessing.

Anonymous said...

kalau boleh vote, i vote for divorce. hukhuk.. not bcos i suka benda2 cerai ni tp betol la seperti dikata peguam tu.

lagipun, dah terang2 u x cinta dia apatah lagi rasa hormat kpd suami pun dah tak ada. i mean, if u stay just utk kumpul dosa sbg isteri apalah gunanya.

apa2pun i hope for the best to u. either u divorce or not i hope kebahagiaan akan tetap jadi milik u bcos u deserve it. i'm sure :)

Anonymous said...

Dulu pon i takot nak bercerai selalu bermain dalam pikiran i merasa " What If" dia berubah , pastu dia cinta gila kat i.. tapi setelah pikir punya pikir i have decidd to proceed with the divorce.. rupanya blessing in disguise .. kalau tak cerai i takkan kawin dengan lelaki yang baik macam husband i sekarang... sebab kebahagiaan ni kalau kita tak usaha nak dapatkan memang kita takkan merasa la.. maybe Adam akan ebih bahagia.. kalau you asyik gaduh kesian kat adam nanti dia ingat dalam rumah tangga memang selalu macam tu ..

Liyana Sohaime said...

i cuma silent reader je kat blog ni..but i hope you will find happiness after this..you deserve to be happy..wish all the best for u and Adam..:)

Anonymous said...

I have not visited your blog for a while but am so happy that finally you have found the courage to break away from your cheating husband.Kalau dia tak nak bercerai, give him another chance...on your terms.Kalau masih nak menggatal dan tidak bertanggungjawab and if he ever abuses you physically (emotionally pun dah good reason enough to divorce him), just get out.Then puasa and solat hajat supaya ditenukan jodoh yang beriman dan bertanggung-jawab.Ask Allah and you will get,InsyaAllah.